Saturday, August 29, 2015

Fill my heart

Fill my heart

 I had some old quilted fabric that I just can't seem to throw away and decided to try to make this heart.  For my first draft at trying to make this heart it came out pretty well.   I'm going to make some more, but I learned some things about myself in this journey of making. 
When I first made the heart and turned it right side out it looked odd.  I was even going to throw it away disappointed with the result.   I think sometimes I give up on myself too easily.  When I initially start something and it doesn't produce the result I saw in my head.  I just leave it alone.  I guess naturally we want success in our first result, but success does really come from not getting the result you wanted in the first try. 
As I started stuffing the heart and pushing that batting into those rounded areas.  The heart  started to become what I envisioned.   The more I stuffed the heart the better it got. 

The heart is symbolic to love.  With love their are concepts of joy, being satisfied, content, or even places of rest.  Never does love have the concept of suffering, loose, or devastation. At least not in the advertising world.

 In the world love is only easy.  I think that's why divorce is so easy for people to do.  I will love you when you are, what I want.  I don't want to suffer or endure loose being married to you.   Oh yeah when your not what I want.  I will look somewhere else.   I do think that is kind of love is foolish.  It doesn't count the cost of real love.  It looks like love, feels like it, but in truth its a lie.       

Real love endures much suffering.  Real love the bible says never fails.  Real love loves even when its not loved.  Real love will love you even when your not what you should be.  Real love wants the best for even its enemy.  Love doesn't want evil for others, because it will not defile itself with hate. 

Real love encompass all these concepts?  The feeling of joy, but without suffering or enduring its not real.  I have learned that the greatest love has come through suffering.  It was when I delivered my first born.  Their was suffering, but without suffering.  I would of never experienced the greatest love.   

Sometimes with my family I have been hated.  I have learned despite them, I will love them.  Even if it is  from afar.  Hoping for the best regardless of the words, opinions, slander, or gossiping words.   Their behavior doesn't matter.  I have to choose who I want to be full of in my heart. 

Hate is like a sickness that is so easily to get infected by.  It has energy and force that fills the space with weight.  It is heavy and burdensome.  Those that feed off of it are limited by its self destructive force.  Like a ticking time bomb who knows when it will destroy and how far its depths will it devastate the land of peoples heart that it infiltrates.  Hate is like a house that has been bombed.  The air is contaminated and devastation of loose cannot be seen.  911 is a concept of hate.   Those that hate don't know the harm they cause.  They lash with their tongue and devour people with their words.  Like a raging bear hungry to tear the flesh and destroy its victim.     Hate has many victims, but hate doesn't take responsibility for its wrong.  Hate blames everyone for why it hates. 

Love I have learned is light.  Bright and vibrant and even in suffering enduring.  Refusing to go bitter.   Learning from wrongs and those it wronged.  Making sure you fill my heart with what truly expands the experience of life.  To love despite others.  To Love regardless of getting what we want.  To love so that we may be full. 

I had a brother that went through great moments of suffering.  Seeing him smile and continue to be present in my life.  I saw great love through him.  He was handicap and incapable to do anything.  Reliant on humans who are vicious, hateful, and even evil.  He had no control over his life.  He couldn't feed himself, couldn't even talk, or  walk.   I saw his suffering and how he was rejected.  I would go see him.  He made sure he smiled.  Through him I learned the concept of great love.  That regardless of your condition, or physical limitations, or even place of living it doesn't determine the freedom you are inside.   To some he was a nothing.  To me he was everything.  I learned from him.  He was wonderful to behold!  He has been a great example of love, suffering, endurance, and persistence among great tribulation.  He choose to love and smile. 

Their are always great examples of who we should be.  I think the community of the handicap and the rejected of our society.  Are those that can teach us the greater lesson of what real greatness is and what real love looks like.   That is if we are looking for a real love?! 

Real love is sometimes right in front of you!  If we are not careful we will not see the beauty and the opportunity to learn from it. Because we are deceived by societies concept of love, that we don't see real love when its among us! 


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